Would you like to have better-behaved children? Would you like to build a closer bond with your children? Would you like to know what happens in their day when you are not around?
Special time is an activity to bring you closer to your children.
I have found that this activity has brought me closer to both my children and helped me understand how they are feeling. Along with the benefits it has had for me, special time gives children the attention they crave and the power to be in charge making them feel important.
Spend at least 10 minutes of uninterrupted time every day (and if you can twice a day) per child doing what your child wants to do.
This means your child chooses the activity they want you to play with them.
For example, if my daughter wants to play Barbies and as we are playing, she wants to pretend she is the mother and we have the most random conversation (with her telling me what to say), I let her, and I say what she asks. Or when colouring in and they want to colour in my picture with mismatched colours while going outside the lines. I let them with a smile on my face however my perfectionist personality is screaming quietly inside WHY!
I learnt this strategy from Amy McCready Founder & Parenting Coach of Positive Parenting Solutions. You can read Amy’s blog about it here. Amy refers to it as Mind, Body and Soul time which is when ‘you fill your children’s attention baskets positively and proactively, your kids will become more cooperative and less likely to seek out attention in negative ways.’
You will also find you have better-behaved children and more time for yourself again.
This small addition to your life will change the behaviour of your children drastically. They are getting their love and attention buckets filled daily so they are not misbehaving to get your attention. In addition, your kids will open up a lot more about random events such as what happened at school or the truth about how many lollies they ate at grandma’s house.
You are probably thinking, where am I going to get 10 minutes per child, my day is already busy as it is. Well, I thought the same thing, but what I realised is that Special time is an investment rather than a cost to my own time. I found that after having special time, my children would spend a lot more time playing together or by themselves as their attention buckets have been filled and they are not looking at me to entertain them.
Special time will soon become the favourite part of everyone’s day
The best outcome of Special Time for me is that the kids ask me daily for a special time and tell me that it is their favourite part of the day. They even choose to have special time with me instead of watching television quite often.
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