When I Was 14, I Thought I Was Fat…

School had just finished, and us girls were on the tram heading home. We were chatting about the usual teenage things—until the conversation shifted to weight.

Then Ruth, a friend a few sizes bigger than me, joined in. “Me too,” she said, lifting her top to reveal a handful of belly fat—four to five times more than mine.

And what did I do?

I turned to her and said, “You don’t need to lose weight. That’s just skin. Mine’s fat.”

And I meant it.

At that moment, I truly believed I was fat—and that Ruth wasn’t. That’s how distorted my self-image was.

Looking Back…

Now, as an adult, I’m mortified. Not just because of how I may have made my friend feel, but because I genuinely thought I was fat—and unworthy—at 14. And truthfully? Even now, as a fit size 6–8, I still struggle at times with body image.

I’m also a mum now, and the thought of my daughter ever feeling that way about herself breaks my heart. She has the most incredible figure—and I want her to know it, not question it.

So where did this body dissatisfaction begin?

Where It All Started

Here’s what I’ve come to realise:

• My mum has spent my entire life talking about losing weight. She’s always on a new diet or planning to start one “on Monday.”
• My dad has also struggled with body image issues and chasing the latest fad diet.
• As girls and women, we often sit around discussing what we hate about our bodies instead of celebrating what we love.
• Magazines, ads, and beauty brands have spent decades showing us a version of “beauty” that’s airbrushed, filtered, and unrealistic. They sell us solutions by convincing us we’re not enough as we are.

Did you know some celebrities spend thousands just to appear on a red carpet? Professional makeup artists contour their legs to make them look thinner. They wear Spanx, hair extensions, fake tans, and edited images flood our screens.

Jamie Kern Lima shared this in her book Believe It, and it blew me away.

The Beauty Illusion

The beauty industry is worth billions. Why? Because we’ve been sold an illusion.

The images we see aren’t real or sustainable—but they are effective at making us spend more: more on beauty, more on skincare, more on things we’re told will “fix” us.

But what if we weren’t broken to begin with?

You Can Love Beauty AND Yourself

I want to be clear—I love beauty. I love getting dressed up, facials, skincare, and taking care of myself. I believe in health, exercise, and building strength.

But the difference now is: I’m learning to love myself first. I want to be healthy, not because I hate my body, but because I respect it.

So let me ask you—what’s beautiful about you?
What can you learn to love about your body, just as it is?

Let’s Change the Narrative

If you have children, how do you want them to feel about themselves?

My mum, at size 14, has spent 40 years saying she needs to lose weight—yet only gained more over the years. What if, instead of always chasing a number, she focused on loving where she’s at and creating a healthy lifestyle from there?

Here’s My Challenge To You

Look in the mirror today—not to criticise, but to accept. Then, make yourself these 3 promises:

• Start small and implement consistent healthy habits.
• Stop speaking negatively about your body.
• Keep promises to yourself. Even if they’re small.

You are so much more than your body. But your body is your home—so let’s take care of it with love, not punishment.

Now it’s your turn…

Have you ever had a moment like mine—where your self-image didn’t match reality?

Maybe you’ve said something to yourself in the mirror that you’d never say to someone you love. Or maybe you’re working on unlearning the same things I am.

I’d love to hear your story.
👇 Leave a comment below and share:
✨ What’s one thing you’re learning to love about your body?
✨ What message do you want the next generation—your kids, nieces, nephews—to hear about body image?

Let’s open the conversation and support each other.
Because the more we speak honestly, the more we heal—together. ❤

Subscribe to the blog for more transformative insights and practical tips to empower your journey! Follow us on Instagram and Facebook for your daily dose of motivation, inspiration, and community updates. Let’s stay connected and grow together!

🌱 Book a free 30-minute strategy call with me.
We’ll talk about where you are, where you want to go, and how I can support you on your journey to confidence, healing, and self-worth.

👉 Click here to book your free call now. Let’s take that first step together.