Living by our values is an aim of most people in life. But what happens when you have to choose one value over another? This can lead to much pain, anguish and indecision.

One of the most important values to many people is family. But we are not always going to see eye to eye with our parents or children. Either we have to disappoint our parents, or we end up disapproving of our children. This is a difficult but natural part of life. Each person is affected by their own individual experiences as well as what is going on around them, so each person is going to have their own individual set of values and priorities. Breaking away from parents is a necessary part of life, as is letting your children grow up and being allowed to make their own decisions.

Self respect is very important. You have to believe that you are doing what you believe is right and don’t let others bully you out of that. They may disapprove and try to make you feel bad about it but stay true to yourself. Much easier said than done, I know.

Brene Brown has a good list of values here. It may be useful to go through this list to really define the direction you want to take in life, and to work out which values you prioritize over others.

Now I am not saying that you will be able to live by your values at all times to your satisfaction. Of course, there are times when we get swayed by other people and decide on something different. But when this happens, we may feel it in our bodies or minds and after some period of time we may decide to revisit that decision, even though it may involve disappointing others. Self-respect is the key. We can’t get away from ourselves.

About the Author

Sally is a home organisation and budgeting expert with a passion for helping families take the stress out of everyday tasks by creating simple, efficient and cost-effective processes. Her strategies can result in more time and energy being available to spend time doing what you love. Sally is a quiet budgeting queen, home organisation specialist, wife, mother, animal-loving mathematician and so much more.