What are mornings like for you? Are they calm and relaxed with everyone working together as a team? Or are they a little crazy with you screaming at the kids to get ready, reminding them constantly on what they need to do and yelling hurry up so that you all can get out the door in time?
Avoid Morning Battles
In our house, a typical morning used to be my child sitting around while I rushed around and did everything for them, I picked up their clothes, dressed them, made their beds, organised breakfast and so forth so that everything could be done, and we could try to leave on time.
Then on the weekends I would be yelling, telling the kids to get dressed yet they would dawdle, and the day wouldn’t start until lunchtime.
Set up a morning routine with a list for the kids to follow
Finally, I had enough!
Something had to change before I went insane. I had to do something different. As a project manager, I organise my days through standard lists. I decided to try the same at home (since morning routine list success I now have lists for everything, bedtime, leaving for activities, cleaning schedule, meal plan and so much more – keep an eye out).
This has changed my life, our mornings are a lot smoother as the kids know automatically now what they need to do. They feel empowered as they are in control. We still have our moments, however 90% of time it is smooth sailing.
Work with your child to create the list however ensure that you do include all items you want to be done in the morning
Here is the list we use in my home:
1. Wake Up
The kids picked this one and love it as it is a quick win, so it is guaranteed that they will tick one item off the list. We have started using an alarm (or opportunity clock as Zig Ziglar would call it) that they wake up to.
2. Make, Eat and Pack Up Breakfast
The goal here is to get them to make their own breakfast and clean up afterwards (so that you don’t have to).
Initially, there will be times when the milk may spill, or they over pour the cereal. That is ok, progress over perfection.
Once they have finished breakfast they need clean up, this includes putting dirty dishes in the dishwasher/sink and putting away breakfast items used.
3. Brush Teeth
Depending on the age of the kids you may need to supervise and help ensure that the back teeth are brushed. Getting a 2 minute timer so they know how long to brush teeth for is a good investment.
4. Get Dressed
For this to work especially with younger kids you may need to rearrange the wardrobe. I re-organised the wardrobe where school and everyday clothes were low and easy to reach for them. For party or fancy clothes, I put them higher and will give it to them as they need.
Having the clothes easy to reach has allowed the kids to choose their own outfits (sense of power for them). I do guide them on the weather for example if it is hot, I suggest shorts and t-shirt or cold a jumper, long pants with a long sleeve top underneath. However ultimately, they can pick what they want and if they underdress for the weather such as put shorts on in the middle of winter. I let natural consequences (them getting cold) play out learning through self-error is sometimes the best teacher.
Another note, if you are fussy with what your children wear and want to make sure they match (or is that just me?), I recommend hiding or donating clothes that you do not like or you do not want them to wearing. I generally buy plain pants (that go with everything) and whatever tops they like. Even though at times my kids may not choose perfectly matched clothes, at least they tend to look presentable.
5. Make Bed
Set a standard rule for making bed such as blankets/duvet straight (as they possible can) and pillows arranged.
This is one area I needed help with as my perfectionist nature wanted the beds made perfectly straight with pillows arranged nicely and maybe only one stuffed toy that was coordinated with the bedsheets.
I let it go and gave them control of making the bed how they want. I may now have more stuffed animals on the bed than I desire, however, I am impressed at how much they have improved at making the bed.
6. Do Hair
Lastly to finish before leaving is to make sure hair is done. I recommend including boys also as it is about getting in the routine of looking presentable (for when they need to in the future).
Depending on the age of the kids you may need to assist with. For my daughter I tend to help her tie her hair, however, she brushes her beforehand.
Consistently implement on a daily basis until it becomes a habit
The key is being consistent, even if it is the weekend, school holidays or just a day off follow the same routine. Be prepared initially, it may take longer (and your stress may increase) with the new routine as the kids adapt or whine about the new tasks that they have to do. Attempt to stay calm remember it is the long term benefit and celebrate wins along the way.
One way to introduce the kids to the new routine is taking time for training. You can teach them the new routine, ask them questions or input for suggestions. When we did this my kids wanted to have breakfast before getting dressed. I changed the routine and it gave them a sense of power and control.
If you are still struggling with the routine then you can add another layer such as when morning routine is done and you have spare time before we need to leave then you can play, watch TV (or a exciting activity for them) before school. I find this will motivate them to be ready quicker.
EXPERT TIP – Set a timer for your kids for when they need to be ready by
Lastly, from experience kids love checklists, following a plan and then ticking it off. Here are printable checklists we use:
Girl’s Morning Check List
Boy’s Morning Check List
Morning Routine Chart on the Kids Bedroom Door
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