From Chaos to Calm: How a Documented Routine Transformed Our Family

One of the things that’s worked well for my family is documenting our routine and expectations. I have found by putting everything down on paper, everyone now knows what’s expected of them, frees up my brain space from having to remember and stops the constant negotiations from the kids.

Documenting our routine has been an effective way to establish clear rules and expectations within our household. I review it 3-4 times a year, usually at the start of each school term, as activities and schedules evolve. This allows us to adjust as the kids grow and take on more responsibility. For example, my daughter now helps by folding and putting away the washing, something she couldn’t do a few months ago.

Here’s a summary of how we structure our day. I recommend creating a similar routine for your family and sharing it with your kids so everyone is clear on what’s expected. Be sure to involve the kids in preparing the routine – this not only helps them understand their responsibilities but also encourages buy-in and continued compliance.

Our Family Routine

Breakfast

5 times a week, my husband and I prepare breakfast for the kids. We make French toast, banana pancakes (2-3 eggs mixed with one mashed banana) or oat cookies.*
Each child can have a glass milk with half a scoop of protein powder to the milk if desired. We
On the second serving of breakfast, they can drizzle a teaspoon of honey.
Otherwise, the kids are responsible for making their own breakfast (usually cereal or toast though they can cook if the choose).

*We choose to make breakfast because we want to give the kids a healthy start to their day. The eggs add important protein to their diet.

School

Leave for school between 8:20-8:40 am.
They walk to and from school by themselves, and they can walk separately.
After school, they have a snack, usually fruit and yoghurt or rice cakes, to hold them over until dinner.

Lunch

Lunches are typically packed the night before by the kids (sometimes they pack them in the morning).
Each lunchbox must contain at least a fruit and vegetable.

Dinner

No snacking one hour before dinner.

Homework

The kids read aloud to one of the parents at least 3-4 times a week (ideally more, but it can get challenging with everything going on).
While Chloe does her homework, Jake reads to an adult, practices spelling words, or works on some math timetables.
We aim for at least 20 minutes a night of homework Mon-Thurs.

Clean-Up

After breakfast, prior to going to get ready all breakfast dishes to be put in the dishwasher and items put away (eg honey).
Jake’s responsibility is to empty the dishwasher when required.
After dinner, they:
- Clean the table.
- Wipe and put away all the dishes, including big pots (based on whose turn it is).
- Fill drink bottles.
- Put shoes away.
- Clean up their items from the dining, lounge, and kitchen areas.
Chloe’s responsibility to fold the washing when required

Showers

We keep an eye on how long the kids are in the shower (especially Jake, who loves to play in the water). When it’s time to finish, I knock on the door and ask him to get out.

Bedtime

The kids are in bed between 8:30 – 8:45 pm, where they can read or play.
Lights out by 9:30 pm.
They can sleep together, except on Friday nights when Chloe has gym at 8 am the next day.

Special Time

We try to spend 10-15 minutes of uninterrupted time with each child at least 3 times a week (sometimes we manage to do it daily).
The kids love this special time, and it helps fill their “love buckets.”
We follow a simple system: one child has special time while the other plays on their own, then we switch.

Read Further about Special Time here:

This is a sneak peek into our family’s routine. How do you structure your day at home? I encourage you to try this exercise, and leave a comment below with any additional tips or ideas you have. Let’s create a community list to help each other!

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