Raising children who value hard work, perseverance, and teamwork is a goal many parents share. True encouragement, which focuses on effort rather than inherent traits, can play a significant role in fostering these values in your child. It’s not about praising the child for being “good” or “smart” but about acknowledging their hard work, dedication, and growth in a particular activity.

Why Encouragement Matters

Encouragement motivates a child from within. Unlike praise, which can sometimes lead to a child seeking external validation, encouragement helps children realise that their efforts and actions have intrinsic value. This internal motivation is crucial for developing resilience, a love for learning, and the ability to overcome challenges.

Encouraging Effort, Not Just Outcomes

To instil these values, it’s essential to focus on the process rather than just the outcome. When children recognise that their achievements stem from their hard work (eg the chin up was achieved through constant training and hard work), they’re more likely to keep striving for improvement. Whether they’re learning a new skill, helping around the house, or excelling in school, it’s important they understand that perseverance and effort are what truly count.

Remember, they won’t get it perfect right away. As they progress and improve, acknowledge their effort and growth. This lets them know they’re on the right track and encourages them to keep going.

31 Phrases to Encourage Your Child

Here are 31 phrases that can help you encourage your child and promote positive behaviour:

1. You’re really improving at this!
2. You handled that situation very maturely.
3. Thank you for your help!
4. You should feel proud about what you’ve accomplished.
5. I can see how much effort you put into that.
6. I can tell you spent a lot of time thinking this through.
7. Your commitment is really paying off.
8. It’s clear you put a lot of thought into this.
9. That “A” reflects a lot of hard work!
10. Your focus really shows in the results.
11. That’s a very good observation.
12. I see a very thorough job!

13. You keep trying, even when it’s tough.
14. Thanks for helping wipe the dishes; that made a big difference.
15. You’re becoming more confident in your abilities.
16. You found a great way to handle that!
17. Your perseverance paid off.
18. It’s amazing to see how far you’ve come!
19. You’re so dedicated to mastering this.
20. I can tell you’ve been practising a lot! You have improved in your maths
21. You’ve shown a lot of courage in trying something new.
22. That was a very thoughtful gesture.
23. You’re doing a great job of staying positive!
24. You worked really hard to get this kitchen clean!
25. I noticed you were really patient with your little sister.
26. What do you think about it?
27. You seem to really enjoy English.
28. That’s a tough one, but you’ll figure it out.
29. Look how far you’ve come!
30. I trust your judgment.
31. The time you’re putting into your homework is really paying off.
32. I love being with you.
33. You really put a smile on her face with your kind words!
34. I can tell you really care.
35. You make it look easy!
36. I really feel like a team when we work like this!
37. You’ve shown great persistence!

By focusing on encouragement rather than praise, you help your child understand that their effort and perseverance are what truly matter. This approach not only promotes positive behaviour but also equips them with the mindset needed to tackle future challenges with confidence and resilience. Remember, the goal is to help your child see that it’s their effort, not just their natural abilities, that leads to success. This mindset will serve them well throughout their lives, both on and off the field.

Share your thoughts in the comments below on how you plan to encourage your child for the effort they put in.

BONUS TIP – Remember the same applies to you, acknowledge your effort, grown and progress overtime.